May 09, 2001
I’m always so very good at having ideas and projects in my head. The only trouble I seem to have is putting them into action. It’s not for lack of want or passion or energy. I think it’s because I overwhelm myself with so many ideas, I’m never sure where to start.
I’ve started getting into a morning routine, so that at least each day I know what to do for sure. It sort of centres me, grounds me and I desperately need this right now if any of this is going to work.
I should scratch that last sentence; it sounds too negative, especially since I know it will work. The excitement in my toes and the smile on my lips and the encouragement of others tells me so. It’s still hard to believe.
I’ve decided that I’m going to use these days as a morning pages exercise, although I’m not going to write about my daily life, how I hoovered, what I baked, or that I did manage to find a great sale on toilet paper at the local store. It’s going to be strictly about art and writing and creativity. I have to start getting this all out rather than keeping it all in. How will anyone know what it really takes if the information is sitting in my brain?
And I feel it has to come about because I am still getting emails from people saying, “I am stuck in my old dull life, I wish that I could do what you’re doing.” And I want to find them, and go to them, grab them by the shoulders and give them a little shake and then whisper into their ear You can do it. You can. Just try. Try.
Since I can’t find everyone, I have to use this site to communicate that. I have to get people to listen. I have to accomplish something.
I woke up to several emails in my email box after a long time of it being quiet. Words for encouragement I received. Compliments, questions, invitations. It was amazing to me. I think, no matter how emails I’ve got, I will never be used to the words “thank you” I am just me, I have no magic.