“And frightened people will resist any help you can give them, and they will blame you for the stress the change is causing. Scared people like to shoot the messenger.

The worst kind of frightened person is one with power. Someone in a mob of other frightened people, someone with a gun, someone who is the CEO. When confronted with a scared CEO, time to run. Before someone can change, they have to learn, and before they learn, they have to cease being scared.

One reason so many big ideas come from small organizations is that there is far less fear of change at the top. One mistake board members and shareholders make is that they reward the scared but hyper-confident CEO, instead of calling him on the carpet as he rages at change.” – Seth Godin

“I think we’re starting to see a fundamental shift in the way small businesses are started and the way that they’ll succeed. I’m hoping future small business owners will ask themselves what part their business will play in wider society – what impact will they have, socially and environmentally? What can they offer and what can they give back to the community in which they’re rooted? I’m convinced that those kinds of questions will assume increasing importance. And I’m wildly optimistic about their prospects for success. To me, entrepreneurs have always represented change. As an entrepreneur myself, what I’ve discovered through the years is, seeking those people out, listening to them, amplifying their encouragement, and sort of turning a deaf ear to the people who are defending the status quo, is a lot more fun and an easier way to spend your day.” Seth Godin in a great Q&A interview.

“There is a difference between ambition and greed. Ambition drives us to be extraordinary, reach higher, and do outstanding work. Greed is the byproduct of a scarcity mentality that tells us our gains must come at the expense of others.” The Slow Growth is Smart Growth Manifesto

It’s interesting I have been getting a lot of emails lately asking where I exactly am I in the creative world. This strikes me odd for a couple of reasons. One, there’s the assumption a person can “leave” the creative world and that I’ve done just that or the second that because I am not posting sketches or art or talking about the woe’s of an artist, I am not involved as a creative anymore. And neither could be further from the truth.

What is true is that being a full-time traditional artist/writer wasn’t my calling; I am not good at it really and don’t get much joy from it. I require living a full life (travel, work, people) in order to write and create so working at home, alone, just isn’t useful or healthy for me. I’m someone who thrives by working with people, I love dressing up and having a place to go, I love changing up my work and incorporating art and business. Although it took me awhile to realise both those things and I’m glad I tried to be that full-time creative from home to really learn really what does – and doesn’t – work for me. And when something doesn’t work, I shift and find something that does.

What my experience has also taught me is that “Creativity” is a HUGE word – bigger than “art” and “writer” and talking about feelings, fears, dreams. There are people that can do those things and even I did them when I first started to be full-time creative in 2001. There was a purpose for me being a writer then and talking about what I was going through. That purpose was this site which launched Another Girl at Play which launched a lot of artists, female oriented creative sites, a creative community and a whole new movement online. But once that purpose wore off, I was a very unhappy creative person because just talking about being a writer, just talking about being creative and staying stuck in that role was anything but creative!

It’s often so easy to see when you’re in an unhappy rut in a corporate job but not so easy when you run your own company doing what you supposedly love. It can get  so easy to become stuck playing out the artist or writer role, of making personal discoveries you feel you must share every day and talking only with other artists and so forth. I think that can be a dangerous path to be on. I take a look at some of the people who started out along with me or just after and see them in the same place mentally, physically and creatively. Nothing new is coming out. Nothing new is being produced in their creative communities. There doesn’t seem to be a lot of joy but a lot of struggle and always challenges at self-acceptance. I think that’s because they’re stuck and it’s scary to let go. It’s so scary to stop what isn’t working – we all know this. But if what you’re doing is creative and supposed to be amazing, it can seem like a downright failure to stop – especially if you’re public about it.

I went through through this fear around 2005 when I didn’t want to be a full-time writer,didn’t want to be a famous blogger, and didn’t want to be the poster child for leaving a corporate gig for a creative one. I was so sick of hearing my own thoughts let alone sharing them and championing women into a role I didn’t necessarily believe was right for everyone. So I became quiet and shifted on my own.

I began working on film sets, I began helping producers adapt books into movies, I worked on web sites and wrote content for major companies like Disney. I created still life’s in famous stores and travelled the world to write about it for major publications. I consulted with new media companies about how to get into social media without losing the human touch, I helped all my friends who had their own businesses learn about branding and PR and contracts. Working with others and often other companies, is where I found my real groove. It’s where I came alive and where I found personal success that has been sustaining me all these last few years.

Although I love photography and sometimes sell my work with a travel article or for an ad campaign, I have no desire to do gallery shows anymore or sell prints. And travel writing is something I love doing on the side but right now, it’s not something I want to do full-time. And painting? Drawing? I’ve always hated it because I’ve never been good at it or crafty and trying to make myself enjoy it was a mess! So I have all these passions – photography, writing, travel – but I actually don’t make a full-time living at them and actually enjoy them so much more because there’s no pressure attached to them. They’re in incorporated into all my jobs and my life and that’s what keeps me going.

It’s why I now really believe that one should not always pursue their passion but bring their passion to everything they do. And I do. There is not one task I take on that I do not love, believe and want to be a part of. When I work, I love it. I’m creative. I play at my job and succeed at it – whatever it is. I don’t define it, I don’t measure it, I don’t say it has to be X and if it’s Y I’ve failed and I do not ever worry about it changing. Creativity means change and if you’re not comfortable with that, then really, do the steady 9-5 thing. You will, in the long run, be much more happy. I assure you. And there is no shame in that. There is shame in living a life you think you should have, whether it’s in the corporate or creative world, and not really loving it.

One finds happiness in the actions of their purpose and not in the dreaming and talking of it. Be weary of anyone who tells you otherwise and especially of anyone who is only doing the talking! Life is really in the doing so really make sure you’re doing something you want to do – whether it’s arty or business, in an office or at home – and that you’re bringing all you’ve got to it each and every day. And if it’s not working, look at why it’s not and tweak it until it’s not working anymore and then move on.

Deluxe: How Luxury Lost Its Luster is a fascinating albeit slightly depressing read for anyone who has in the past loved luxury or service. Shopping in boutiques has always been something I’ve loved to do because I would get the best and most knowledgeable service. The sales people would learn my name, they’d put things aside when they came in, they could tell me the little details, they’d wrap up my packages and make shopping an experience whether I was buying something for $20 or $200.

Living in Santa Monica with neighbors like Los Angeles and Malibu, “luxury” boutiques are all around. Every name designer and brand is within easy reach of me yet service and knowledge within those companies is pretty elusive. Even more so during the recession, which you think would be opposite.

During tough times, when foot traffic has slowed and dropping cash is slower still, you’d think companies would regroup, get rid of unproductive, knowledgeable people and train those that stay on how to treat and engage customers, how to explain the products from a t-shirt to a ring to a Bentley and then train them on how to present it upon check out.

But I can’t tell you how many luxury stores I’ve been to where the sales people just kind of do their own thing from gossiping with each other, to letting merchandise just unfolded on shelves to saying, “Um, I don’t know” when asked a question. In a store shelling out luxury products and I as their only customer in sight, it’s frustrating. I’m actually a European shopper in the sense I generally like to be left alone to browse but when I have a question, someone better have an answer. And if I’m going to spend money I don’t take into consideration just the price of the item but the entire experience. If the sales person makes it less than, I walk.

Yesterday a girlfriend and I went to the new J.Crew Collection store in Malibu, one of three in the country. We were the only customers with 5 sales girls running around. To their credit, the nicest woman came over and was genuinely interested in helping us and talking to us and we were genuinely happy to be petting the pretty things – specifically the luggage.

With a trip coming up to Europe, my girlfriend wanted to buy it. She hesitated at the price and asked my opinion since I’m a frequent traveller. I tried asking the sales lady a lot of questions but the first problem was it took 4 sales women to figure out how to open the special lock system. And then they each just gave a quick blurb about how it was hand made for the Royal Family and limited edition. I asked a few more questions but didn’t get answers to those. It was, however, a stunning piece of luggage and I had read up online about it a little so I knew the quality was high and could totally see my girlfriend with it.

But with such a big purchase, she wanted to make sure she knew what she was getting. And you’d expect from a store – especially a high-end retailer – to be able to get your every bit of information and present it in a totally confident way. But when she  asked the price it took four women and about ten minutes to try to figure out the price of the bag. When she asked to see the inside, it took about another 10 minutes to figure out how to open it. When she wanted to know all the materials used, it took scrambling around to find out what the material was (we were told the shell was made out of leather even though it clearly wasn’t). Totally in-love with the product, my friend hesitated in buying it because the whole experience in the store seemed uncertain. The staff wasn’t making it easy for her to say yes to buying. Their confusion made her confused about buying.
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BabyCakes, the Book of Recipes: It’s Here! from BabyCakes NYC on Vimeo.

Erin McKenna the smart, savvy, passionate entrepreneur behind the successful bakery Babycakes NYC, has a book coming out, BabyCakes: Vegan, Gluten-Free, and (Mostly) Sugar-Free Recipes from New York’s Most Talked-About Bakery.

She made the above video to let people know and what I love about this video is you see her, you see the bakery, you see the glee and fun and then you see what you can make if you get the book. It’s all so slick but it feels completely authentic – like you want to be a part of it even though a company is selling you something. I love that kind of marketing.

It’s too easy for us to get caught up in the vision we’re driving towards and ignore our own health and well-being along the way. If you can have a life while you run your business — if you can lead a healthy, well-rested, diverse life, that is, rather than a workaholic one — your clarity, productivity, and creativity will all benefit. And those aren’t things that are just nice to have — they’re critical to your success as an entrepreneur.

from Lauren Bacon’s (of The Boss of You: Everything A Woman Needs to Know to Start, Run, and Maintain Her Own Business) blog post for Biz Ladies 09: HR for the Self-Employed: Perk Up!

Amish settlements have become a cliché for refusing technology. Tens of thousands of people wear identical, plain, homemade clothing, cultivate their rich fields with horse-drawn machinery, and live in houses lacking that basic modern spirit called electricity. But the Amish do use such 20th-century consumer technologies as disposable diapers, in-line skates, and gas barbecue grills. Some might call this combination paradoxical, even contradictory. But it could also be called sophisticated, because the Amish have an elaborate system by which they evaluate the tools they use; their tentative, at times reluctant use of technology is more complex than a simple rejection or a whole-hearted embrace. What if modern Americans could possibly agree upon criteria for acceptance, as the Amish have? Might we find better ways to wield technological power, other than simply unleashing it and seeing what happens? What can we learn from a culture that habitually negotiates the rules for new tools? (via)

I often feel like a great contradiction; I have long been an advocate and avid user of technology (having been on every computer since the Commodore 64 & Apple ][) but at the same time have completely resisted so much of it – it took me years to get a cell phone. And although I’ve been online since 1988 and had a web page since 1995, I am really hesitant about spending lots of time reading other blogs and updating my own. I love connection and sharing information but still feel confused about Twitter and Facebook. I totally keep up to date on everything new media and tech because I both love and work in it but at the same time I read lots of books, garden and spend a great deal of time outdoors, disconnected.

Over the past two years I’ve had a really hard time trying to put all of this into words and accurately describe (or even catch up) to how I’m feeling about technology as more of it’s created and incorporated at crazy speeds. Because it’s not going away and really, I don’t want it to. It’s just trying to figure how to be a part of it instead of swept up in it.

With the addition of Twitter, RSS Feeds, and Facebook, I’ve found myself receiving the same bits of information several times over. For example, I used to just subscribe to a blogs feed and access their info that way. But if that person is on Twitter, they’ll also tweet about their new post and link to it. If they’re on Facebook, chances are their Twitter hits their Facebook profile and I’ll get an update there, too. LinkedIn now offers the same. So instead of getting one piece of information one way, I’m getting the same information 3 or 4 different ways which results in an overload.

But what happens if you then remove that person from your Twitter feed? Will they think you aren’t their friend? This has happened to me. People have equated my Twitter removal with a friend removal even though in real life I did a lot more and gave much more support than just clicking “follow” on Twitter. So once you incorporate technology, removing it becomes really hard because of social and sometime business consequences.

A lot of my work is in new media so if I’m not Twittering up a storm or talking about the same things as everyone else or Diggining’ every post, it can seem as though I have no idea about these things. The truth is, I do and almost always know about them from the beginning before main stream thanks to all my geek friends who build the stuff and I get to test it out. But there comes a point where I ask myself, in my personal life, do I need this? How much value does it have to me? How much value does it have to my readers? Am I overloading us both? Am being redundant? Am I just saying whats already said to several mediums just to stay relevant, but not even really being relevant?

Now lets add in the iPhone of which I have had for a couple of years. After my 4 year old more than basic cell phone died I decided to get an iPhone so I wouldn’t have to worry about upgrading for a long time and liked the idea of music/phone. But when people see mine, they think I’m insane. You only have three apps? they ask. Do you need helping knowing about apps? No, I’ll tell them. I’m actually up on a lot of apps, I know what’s out there, I know what’s being built it’s just that my needs don’t require them. I don’t want to be able to do everything all the time on my phone. It used to be if I didn’t have my computer with me, people understood not getting an email right away or me checking out their Flickr or their new MySpace page. But then laptops came to be and so vacationing got really hard. Now with the iPhone, every minute, every day, everywhere you can access every thing.

There’s no reason to miss an email, an update, a YouTube video, or everything you friend ate that day. In fact, I feel like all this technology and access has prevented us from doing more and instead made us monitor more. How much of your day is just catching up on what other people are (uselessly) doing? How much of your information intake is actually propelling you to a better life? How much is just a big time suck but you feel like you just have to keep up with your friends, comment on their status, read that popular blog post or contribute your own for fear of being irrelevant, seeming unhip or worse, out of touch.

I feel the need to reiterate that I love technology and am thankful for the web; it’s provided me a fantastic career and I’ve met the most amazing friends and counterparts because of it. There are so many amazing communities and sites out there from technology to health to home and travel that I have found more than useful, inspirational and just plain fun. But even though so much of my life is incorporated into new media and technology, I don’t want my life to be 100% about it. I don’t want to know that much about everyone or feel obligated to comment on every post or fear that not Digging will make me look stupid as will bailing out on this years SXSW. It’s so easy to get caught up in technology and make some things seem bigger and more important than they are instead of really thinking about each bit of technology’s use to each of us and finding whats really important to us as individuals and making all of that work.

Reading how the Amish use technology really struck a chord with me because I feel like I am constantly negotiating and choosing what to use and how it works for me. Yet I often feel like an outcast for doing so or worse, a really bad friend because I didn’t update as much as my counterparts or I didn’t acknowledge every single status update of every single friend.

I like the idea of being ’sophisticated’ for choosing technology instead of a drone doing everything out of fear or greed. And I like the idea of really learning how to incorporate technology that I really do love and really think has great benefits into a world that still needs to have boundaries and breathing space and conversation instead of just giving personal updates.

I’d be curious to know how others navigate the technological waters; do you love getting several of the same updates? Do you feel pressured to comment on others status or follow their every move? Are you Blackberry free? Do you spend too much time surfing the web or do you have a great online/offline balance? Are you really connecting online? Has technology made your life better or harder to keep up with? Do you embrace every bit of technology and see the benefits personally/professionally in doing so or have you seen more benefits in being selective?

(Cross-posted on Girl at Play while totally seeing the irony!)

“Our sense of value and self-worth is often tied to how much money we make,” says Michael Zwell, human capital expert and author of “Six-Figure Salary Negotiation.” “There is an illusion that we live with and believe that a bigger paycheck makes us happier and more valuable.”

In fact, research shows otherwise. Studies have shown most people feel happier in a five-figure job where they are earning more than the majority of other people in the company than they do in a six-figure job where they are making significantly less than others, says Stan Smith, founder and CEO of Smith Economics Group Ltd., in Zwell’s book. Ultimately, he says, people can’t rely on short-lived salaries, promotions and raises to keep them happy but rather the contributions they make in the long run. From CNN